Have been celebrating my achivement of surviving out here for a whole 3 months with a fire Engine cocktail! Yes beleive it or not i have been upgraded to the luxurious life of being a Maitre D'ete on the Amy Cruise Boat! I think after my last unbelievably stressful trip they though i needed a bit of luxury.

However, i am desperatley missing my life on the Felucca's. Having showers just arn't the same as swimming in the Nile every day and my hair just doesn't feel right now that it is neat and tidy instead of getting into that bird nest dreadlocked state that restults from camping! And i have got so used to disappearing behind bushes that i have practically forgotten how to use a lavatory! So as my mother would say i have been looking and living like a wreck of a hespress! It was great though and it was like living out all my childhood adventure books! Am also missing my Felucca Crews who are amazing guys and have been giving me arabic lessons and teaching me how to play the drums. I can also sing all sorts of Nubian songs and climb the mast of a Felucca like a local!

But the Crusie boat has its bonuses. It has a disco!!! So I had my entire group dressed up in Galabaya's (type of long dress whichi is traditional Egyptian attire) and hired a belly dancer to give us all lessons!

Next stop Sinai!

The art of my job out here is to make every drama seem like an everyday eventuality. The other tactic is to make each obscure dilemma such a unique experience that everyone ends up feelig that they are overwhelmingly lucky to be the only ones to expereince it.

However in some cases neither seem quite appropriate. Let me give you a couple of examples! Last monday one of my group managed to get locked in her bathroom for over an hour eventually freeing herself by taking the bathroom door handle apart by using a pair of tweezers to undo the screws!

Understandably she was a bit perturbed untill i praised her amazing ingenutiy and her status as a truly worldly taveller and one of the few to have deciphered the secrets of the ancient Egyptian dooor locks which had been puzzeling Egyptologists for years! Luckily she left beaming!

More difficult to pass over was yesterday when Hussein the bus driver left the hand break off in a Services car park where it careared backwards heading for a brick wall which it would have collided with at speed had it not been for the coragous Shaun who leapt through the open door and took control seconds before impact. Obviouisly i praised his heroic endevous and congratulated him on passing the first test for potential tour leaders!!! Where was i at the critical momment i hear you ask! Inside sipping a carcadet and watching the episode with horror through the window i'm afraid!