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zulfija riza
sama sam ja [alone]


13 Feb 2006  thru   13 Feb 2006

as a gypsey woman i had always felt as a child, that i was alone in this world. Growing up in croatia i always felt like no man would ever mary me unless he were a gypsey as well.

when my mother decided to bring me to the u.s,i was happy and sad at the same time. i thought that maby in the u.s i would be excepted because i was different. as time went by and i was interested in dating, american guys were out of the question for me, forbidden he would have to be from one of the former yugoslavian countries or my mother would disaprove. what to do , what to do?

i started to date, but even though the guys i would go out with were either croatian or bosnian, the fact that i am a gypsey was a problem. What would happen when they found out what i was? i knew the sterio typical thoughts that would go through my head and i remember what my mom would say, "jebat ce ti mater cigansku kad tad"! she was right.

by the time i found a nice boyfriend that was from bosnia, i decided not to tell him right a away, and wait untill he was in love with me first before i would say anything.

One day i got a phone call from my boyfriend and he sounded like he was upset. i thought right away that he was gonna break off our relationship.I cant tell you all the things that were going through my head at the time.

he started off by saying that he had something to tell me and once i hear what he has to say i might not want to go out with him anymore. i just kept quiet until i heard what he had to say first "ja sam ti bijeli cigan", he said. whats a white gypsey? I had never heard that term before, i only knew of romas like myself. he said that that was what they called gypseys that were not full blood. I couldnt believe my ears!"im a gypsey too!" i said. he thought i was making it up at first until we got into the conversation a little bit more. It was like a match made in heaven. I was so exited that there was a guy i could bring home to mom and he was a gypsey. Unfortunately not every gypsey grl is as lucky as i was and they have to worry about their future and if they will ever find a man who will apreciate them and love them for what they are. My heart goes out to all these girls and if ever they need someone to talk to or even joke around a little bit, i want them to feel free to email me. By the way, me and that white gypsey guy got married and have a beautiful 4 year old daughter.we have been maried for going on 6 years now and still love each other more than anything.

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